Teaching Your Child to Ask for Help: Building Self-Advocacy and Independence

Learning to request help is an essential skill for children and it’s about much more than simply getting support when they need it. Asking for help is a foundational step in self-advocacy and independence. When children realize that it’s okay to need support and that there’s a safe and appropriate way to ask for it, they begin to build confidence, problem-solving skills, and trust in their own abilities.

Self-advocacy begins when children understand their needs and have the tools to express them. It’s a skill that will serve them throughout life, whether they are in school, at home, or in any social setting.

3 Tips to Encourage Your Child to Ask for Help

Whether your child uses spoken words, sign language, or another form of communication, these strategies can be applied across all modes of expression:

1. Model how to ask for help. Children learn by watching the people around them. Use clear, simple language to demonstrate how to ask for help in everyday situations. For example, “I’m not sure how to reach that book. "Can you help me?”

2. Provide opportunities to practice. Create small, safe situations where your child can ask for help. Praise their efforts and respond promptly, demonstrating that their request has been heard and valued. This helps them see that asking for help is both practical and appropriate.

3. Reinforce independence through support. Guide your child gently rather than solving the problem for them. Encouraging them to ask for help while still taking the lead helps them learn to advocate for themselves while building confidence in their abilities. If your child is an AAC user, you can support them through modeling the language on their device.